Old Entries

As the title says, this section is for my old entries to this site!
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Live, Laugh, Love...?


[entry date: 01/21/2024 | Mood: Contemplating | Listening to: A.F Aries艾瑞絲 - K.O.L. (Kill the Oreo Liar) ]

Back during New Year's, I went drinking with my cousin and her friend. It wasn't my first time having drinking with friends, but even then, I'd only take a sip or two. Alcohol rarely tasted good to me, they were all bitter and I'd always mixed them with other drinks when possible. I've also seen enough drunk people in my life, and I don't want to be a bother the same way they've been when they're clouded by the tipsiness it gives.

However, the one they had tasted really good, I'd say it didn't taste like alcohol at all! It was even tangy, which was right up my alley... I ended up having two bottles before getting tipsy, so at least I now know what my limits are. (Don't worry though, we were at our house, so I only need to walk a few steps in case I somehow got black-out drunk)

Anyway, my cousin's friend attended a countdown concert nearby, so she visited my cousin afterwards for a mini-celebration. They invited me since I was the only other cousin available during the time, so us three just talked among ourselves. Mostly about the concert, and their work.

Then there was the convo about or love lives. My cousin told me she's seeing someone, which I was a bit surprised, but not really I guess? Only because I don't see her as someone who'd actively pursue a relationship, but then again, my senses are ass when it comes to that stuff. Looking back, maybe the only reason I didn't see it as a possibility because I thought we're too young for it? But again, then again, we're already in our 20's. If there's a right time to start exploring our love lives, it's probably this time.

So then, my cousin asked me how I thought about this, or if I assumed her sexuality and stuff. I merely replied that I always assume someone's bi unless otherwise stated, which she was absolutely jokingly offended by 😅 She would later tell her mom about this, who then told my mom about it, and they poked fun of me for it 😭 Like sorry for not wanting to assume things? I only said it at the off chance that she might be gay so that she'd know I have her back the same way another one of my cousin is LMAO 😭

Back to the convo. They then ask about me and what my sexuality is, which has been... an ongoing topic between me, my family and relatives, and my friends I guess? They've always pressed me about the type of person that I like, and it even extends to my gender identity. More often than not, it's brought up for laughs, but the topics has already changed by the time I start contemplating about it.

So here's a confession: I don't know.

Sure, I've been a fan of a variety of characters in the past, no matter what their gender was. And I admit, there have been people I liked being around with, from the past up to now.

However, I literally do not understand the concept of love. Specifically, the romance type of love. The "you decide you want to be with this person for the rest of your live and marry and have a home together" kind of love. Just what is it? How do you know if what you feel is love? Can it be learned? Will I even be able to learn about it in this lifetime?

I don't have a problem being alone for the rest of my life; that's the future I've always imagined for myself. Don't know if it's just me catastrophizing about it, but being alone in your home doesn't seem to be a bad thing. At least to me right now. But... You know when you just have this thing in your head that you just wanna figure out and it won't go away unless you search or experience it for yourself? It's that kind of thing for me. It'd be nice to be able to experience it someday. And as much as I don't understand it, I'd be really sad if I end up finding out that I'm not, or will never be, capable of feeling love or giving it to others 😔

So there's that I guess...?

As for gender, well... it's complicated. I'd rather not talk about it, but I'll just let you know in case you haven't seen my profile, she/her pronouns are preferred. Whether or not it means that I identify as a woman or something similar, who the fuck knows 🤷

Anyway, I still haven't reached a conclusion for this 😅 For now, I'm letting myself indulge through different media and stuff. Maybe someday I'll figure it out 😅

[Sidenote, but I literally went ahead and downloaded Love and Deepspace when it was realeased. And it's so!!! Hard to get to!! I didn't know it was first person so I keep getting flustered over the guys!! They're good looking and the dialogue's decent even but why do I feel cringe?! What's wrong with me for God's sake?! 😩]




New Year, Same Old Me (lmao)


[entry date: 01/05/2024 | Mood: ?!??!?! | Listening to: Maison book girl - 鯨工場

Happy New Year everyone! And belated Happy Holidays as well! 🥰

How has everyone been? I hope you had a good last month!

Also sorry for not updating that much 😭 I did say that I'm still busy with school work, and it isn't slowing down anytime soon unfortunately huhu (I'm not beating the stuDYING allegations anytime soon LMAOOOOO)

But I'll do my best to update from time to time!

Anyway, it's 2024! Time flies really fast, huh... Surprisingly, I was able to adjust quickly to the year change, the proof being I was able to immediately write 2024 as the year on my written documents. Yes, probably such a small thing, but that means I'll be able to start the year anew! 😊

And it's not like 2023 was a bad year for me, to be honest. It was really productive, looking back at it.

  • I started the year with my first corporate job, which had... a pretty decent pay I guess... It wasn't enough to justify the work we had to exert, but still, it was a learning experience! I was able to save up enough to buy a new phone, so it was worth it in the end, even if I had to quit the month after.
  • I quit my job because I then got enrolled back to college after a year and a half of stopping (and trying to get back)! I was also able to have classes on campus for the first time since the pandemic, though there were multiple postponements that happened along the way. But eh, it is how it is I guess...
  • I was also able to spend more time with my friends irl! We had multiple get togethers, and even had some sleepovers (which was a first for me!!). I enjoyed all of them of course 😃
  • I also got to meet an online friend of 6 years for the first time in an event! We also had a lot of fun, even if it was for a short time 😊 Hoping to see them again for this and the next more years!!!
  • And for my personal pursuits... I started this site as a hobby and hub for my works! I also started releasing songs again, and they've all been well-received so far fortunately 😌 it has been a while since I've done it, so it was a bit stressful, but it worked out in the end!

So that's a recap for my past year I guess 😆

Is this the part where I put my New Year's Resolutions? I didn't make one for last year, so I was surprise at how I was productive back then. How about I put down some simple goals for myself then?

  • Release a song every month or two! I have a lot of almost finished songs that only need lyrics or a video anyway, so I think this is achievable 🤞
  • Make more art! Learn the thing other people have ben doing where they skip the lineart phase and just color in 😂
  • Do better at school 😭 Only a few more semesters, then I'm done!!

Yeah, you might think, "Mori, if this is your idea of goals, the floor is in hell" and you may be right!! They probably are!! But I just wanna be realistic than shooting for the moon but only barely getting out of the Earth's atmosphere. Plus, wouldn't it be more exciting if I ended up doing more that whatever I wrote here?

So yeah, those are a lot of words LMAOOOO 😂 But here's for a more productive, more exciting year woo!!!! 🎉🥂




Moment of Birth (but a few days late)


[entry date: 11/20/2023 | Mood: Productive | Listening to: HOYO-MiX - Lamentation et Triomphe]

LMAO I still have no idea what to write on this rip ANYWAY

Sooo a few days ago, it was my birthday! 🥳

Not much happened though, since it was a workday and my family was out. But my classes got cancelled, so I had the day to myself! It was kinda nice... And my lola cooked some pancit and lumpia, which was delicious as always 🥰

I was able to work on some of my ✨hobby stuff✨ during that, so I'm feeling positive that I'll be able to release a song soon! I've prepared the stuff I'll need to upload, such as audio files and the PV. I think the only thing I haven't figured out was the album cover for Bandcamp, but I guess I could just crop a screen capture of the PV 😂

Would this entry be better suited for the Music section? Maybe... But this is my blog and I can do what I want! 😤

Speaking of what I want, midterms are this week, which are DEFINITELY not things I want 😭 But I wanna get all of this done with!! Just wanna get over school and be independent and maybe get a place of my own or something!!

So I'll review. Later, maybe. I still have classes right now 🤐




I am so tired, lord give me strenght*


[entry date: 11/11/2023 | Mood: Confused | Listening to: Azari - Black Out]

*(The misspelling is intentional *coughs* ANYWAY-)

First entry for this blog-slash-diary thing, hello!

To be honest, I'm not really sure what's the difference between an online diary and a blog is. To me, a diary is a record of your day-to-day activities, while a blog is whatever thoughts you had. Maybe there's no difference between those two. But a quick Google search says that they're kind of the same?? Ugh, I don't know English is hard 😩

But yeah, my day-to-day activities aren't as interesting, so instead I'll use this as a place to put whatever brainrot thoughts I have!!

Right now, I'm just setting up the basic layout for this page. I took it from Repth's layouts and modified it a bit. Okay, maybe a bit more that supposed to 😅 But I wanted a layout where it's the left side that's empty and not the right, so after looking around, I just decided to heavily modify a theme! It kinda looks plain right now, hopefully as time goes on, I'll be able to make something better!

The illustration at the background is mine by the way, just in case someone might fight me for not crediting hehe 😉

Uhh I don't know how to end this, I'll just say stay hydrated, get some stretches, and sit up properly!

@Repth